EDISI 24 : 16 APRIL 2004 (ENGLISH VERSION)
A Fabulous Offer
A young girl missed her period for two months...Very worried, the mother
goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that
the girl is pregnant now.....
Shouting, Cursing, Crying, the mother scream : "Who was the pig that did
this to you?.I want to know..!!".
The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari
Car stops in front of their house, a mature and distinguished man with dark
hair and impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out of it and
enters the house slowly .
He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and
tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem.
However, I can't marry her because of my personal family situation ,but I'll
take the responsibility .
If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach
Villa and a $1,000,000 bank account . If a boy is born, my legacy will be
A young girl missed her period for two months...Very worried, the mother
goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that
the girl is pregnant now.....
Shouting, Cursing, Crying, the mother scream : "Who was the pig that did
this to you?.I want to know..!!".
The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari
Car stops in front of their house, a mature and distinguished man with dark
hair and impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out of it and
enters the house slowly .
He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and
tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem.
However, I can't marry her because of my personal family situation ,but I'll
take the responsibility .
If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach
Villa and a $1,000,000 bank account . If a boy is born, my legacy will be
a couple of factories and a $2,000,000 bank account .
If it is twins, 5 factory each and $5,000,000 for each child .
However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?".
At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places his hand firmly
on the man's shoulder and tells him : " You Can Try Again ! " .
Name
A woman had 8 children, all of them boys.
So, one day a magazine sent a journalist to her house for an interview.
He asked her about the boys and what their names were; she said 'Kelvin'.
'Right', he said, 'what about that blond one over there? 'Kelvin', she
said.
"Oh, and the tall one with the freckles?' 'Kelvin', she said.
'Well, and the little chubby one with the baseball 'Kelvin', she said.
'Are all your boys called Kelvin?' he asked, 'isn't that terribly
Complicated?'
'Not at all', she said, 'it makes everything very easy, actually.
When shout: Kelvin, tea is ready!, they all come.
When I say: Kelvin, it's time for bed!, they all go to bed.'
'I see. But what if you want only one of them?
'No problem.' she answers. 'Then I call them by their surnames'.
Great News
A college student calls home to his dad. "Hey, Dad! I've got
some great news for you!"
Father: "What, son?"
College student: "Remember that $500 you promised me if I
made the Dean's list?"
Father: "I certainly do."
College student: "Well, you get to keep it."
Wife Vs Devil
The poor country man was deeply hurt as he confronted his
wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought.
"How could you do this!" he asked, almost in tears.
"I don't know," his wife wailed. "I was standing in the
store looking at the dress on sale. Then I found myself
trying it on. It was like the Devil was whispering to me,
'You look great in that dress. You should buy it.'"
"Well," the poor country man persisted, "You know how to
deal with him! Just tell him, "Get behind me, Satan!"
"I did," replied his wife, "but then he said "It looks great
from back here, too."
Guess Who ?
A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced
altitude and spotted a man below in a garden, tending some
flowers. Descending a little bit more to be within talking
range the balloonist shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I
promised a friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I
don't know where I am."
The man below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon
hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are
between 40 and 42 degrees north latitude and between 58 and
60 degrees west longitude."
If it is twins, 5 factory each and $5,000,000 for each child .
However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?".
At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places his hand firmly
on the man's shoulder and tells him : " You Can Try Again ! " .
Name
A woman had 8 children, all of them boys.
So, one day a magazine sent a journalist to her house for an interview.
He asked her about the boys and what their names were; she said 'Kelvin'.
'Right', he said, 'what about that blond one over there? 'Kelvin', she
said.
"Oh, and the tall one with the freckles?' 'Kelvin', she said.
'Well, and the little chubby one with the baseball 'Kelvin', she said.
'Are all your boys called Kelvin?' he asked, 'isn't that terribly
Complicated?'
'Not at all', she said, 'it makes everything very easy, actually.
When shout: Kelvin, tea is ready!, they all come.
When I say: Kelvin, it's time for bed!, they all go to bed.'
'I see. But what if you want only one of them?
'No problem.' she answers. 'Then I call them by their surnames'.
Great News
A college student calls home to his dad. "Hey, Dad! I've got
some great news for you!"
Father: "What, son?"
College student: "Remember that $500 you promised me if I
made the Dean's list?"
Father: "I certainly do."
College student: "Well, you get to keep it."
Wife Vs Devil
The poor country man was deeply hurt as he confronted his
wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought.
"How could you do this!" he asked, almost in tears.
"I don't know," his wife wailed. "I was standing in the
store looking at the dress on sale. Then I found myself
trying it on. It was like the Devil was whispering to me,
'You look great in that dress. You should buy it.'"
"Well," the poor country man persisted, "You know how to
deal with him! Just tell him, "Get behind me, Satan!"
"I did," replied his wife, "but then he said "It looks great
from back here, too."
Guess Who ?
A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced
altitude and spotted a man below in a garden, tending some
flowers. Descending a little bit more to be within talking
range the balloonist shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I
promised a friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I
don't know where I am."
The man below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon
hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are
between 40 and 42 degrees north latitude and between 58 and
60 degrees west longitude."
"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.
"I am," replied the man, "but how did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is
technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your
information, and the fact is I am still lost."
The man below responded, "You must be a manager."
"I am," replied the balloonist, "how did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where
you are going. You made a promise which you have no idea how
to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact
is you are exactly in the same position you were in before
we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault
The Baby
A woman gets on a bus with her baby.
The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've
ever seen.
Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down,
fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"
The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off go
ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you.
"I am," replied the man, "but how did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is
technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your
information, and the fact is I am still lost."
The man below responded, "You must be a manager."
"I am," replied the balloonist, "how did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where
you are going. You made a promise which you have no idea how
to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact
is you are exactly in the same position you were in before
we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault
The Baby
A woman gets on a bus with her baby.
The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've
ever seen.
Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down,
fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"
The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off go
ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you.
posted by AMRIL TAUFIQ GOBEL @ 10:40 PM
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